Late. Her period was days late, which could only mean one thing.
Karen was pregnant. Not pregnant with joy, but pregnant with a child that wasn’t planned. Having been pregnant once before, the North Carolina mom knew these emotions well: fear, worry, guilt, and shame. The last time she was pregnant, she chose abortion. She thought it made sense at the time.
She admits to not knowing what she got herself into when she decided to abort her baby. The abortion clinic told her she would be fine after three days and could return to work. Karen was not fine. She couldn’t even stand up because the pain was so bad. She recalls everyone being distant and offering no hope.
“Everybody kind of makes it seem like it’s an easy solution and you’re just going to move on like nothing happened. But it actually brought me into, like, a really deep depression. I failed a lot of my classes that year. It really put me behind, like, emotionally and in school, and it was a really painful experience, like, emotionally, it took me a long time to get over it and to forgive myself for doing that.”
Pregnant now and with no support, she wondered who she could turn to. The cry of her heart begged for a glimpse of hope. She knew the lasting effects of abortion and knew she didn’t want to feel that way again. While the abortion industry tells women they “can’t” parent, Karen was looking for someone to tell her “she can” parent. Sharing an apartment with her friend, working constantly, and dreaming of going back to school to get her master’s degree—her family told her that a baby just didn’t fit into the picture.
She was afraid to tell the father; they weren’t really on speaking terms at the time. He didn’t want anything to do with her. Karen was in a panic. Honestly, she felt stuck. To this day, she couldn’t shake the cold and painful memories of aborting her first child.
Knowing that church had always been a positive place for her, Karen went to church for some reassurance. Her pastor’s wife listened with compassion as Karen shared her pregnancy news.
“It’s easy to tell somebody to keep a baby, but then to not offer any resources, help, or any guidance.”
“It’s easy to tell somebody to keep a baby, but then to not offer any resources, help, or any guidance.”
Karen
Assured we could help, Karen was given the number to Human Coalition and gave us a call. Here she was offered a listening ear, resources, and guidance.
“Human Coalition gave me a lot of hope that I could keep the baby.”
Prior to her appointment with Human Coalition, Karen felt nervous, doubtful, and unsure how she would be able to provide for her baby. It just didn’t feel realistic to keep the baby. During Karen’s appointment, she listened as the nurse shared her story and how she overcame all obstacles when she faced an unexpected pregnancy. She chose life and told Karen it was possible. After leaving the appointment, Karen felt hope for the first time, a feeling she had been craving since the beginning of this pregnancy. At Human Coalition she had the support, encouragement, and resources at her fingertips needed to parent well.
Believing she could be the mother she wanted to be marked her turning point.
After hearing so many voices say that parenting in her circumstances was impossible, having someone believe in her and speak to what was possible gave her the strength to move forward. Karen knew it wasn’t going to be an easy road, but it was the right decision.
“When I physically couldn’t show up for myself or mentally show up for myself, she would be like a call away and would tell me, if you ever need to talk, just call me.”
Karen acknowledges that her faith gave her the strength and courage to keep the baby. Deep down she knew abortion was wrong.
“I didn’t want to disappoint God again. I prayed, and I told God, like I’m giving this to you. I put me and my baby in your hands, and I feel like you’re going to provide for us.”
After deciding to keep her baby, Karen began tackling obstacle after obstacle. Karen began to save money while working and pursued jobs that would provide more income. Human Coalition supported her throughout her pregnancy with things like applying for assistance with income and creating a baby registry. Karen received diapers, clothes, and whatever else she needed for her baby.
Now that Kai is here, Karen can’t imagine life without him! Months later, Karen is returning to school for her master’s. Despite the sea of voices that told her she couldn’t do both, Karen is doing both—parenting and continuing her education with joy. Becoming a mom has given her a newfound confidence that she can truly pursue her dreams, and Kai is anything but a hindrance to them.
“I would tell other women that are going through this that there is hope, there are resources, there are people who will show up for you, even if the ones that are close to you don’t. And places like this really, really, really hope, and they really encourage you, and they do more than just tell you to keep the baby. So, yeah, and more than that, I feel like God is always going to show up.”
Thank you for making this life decision possible for Karen. Kai is with us today because of your generous donations and powerful prayers! Resources, a compassionate heart, and a listening ear were made available to Karen when she needed it most, and because of that, a life was saved.
