Every conversation about abortion matters. The words you speak can change minds and save lives. Whether you’re talking with a friend, coworker, or family member, these moments are powerful opportunities to share the truth about the value of every human life.
But standing up for life in today’s culture can be challenging. You may fear saying the wrong thing or worry that the conversation will turn into conflict. The good news is that you don’t have to do it alone. With God’s help and the right approach, you can speak with both compassion and conviction when defending your pro-life beliefs.
Here are seven practical tips for having courageous conversations about life so you can communicate truth, show Christ’s love, and help others see the humanity of every preborn child.
1. Lean on God during the conversation. Proverbs 3:5–6 tells us to depend on God, acknowledging His presence and knowledge in all situations. Trust Him, pray for His direction in your conversation, and let the Holy Spirit lead you to influence the other person’s heart, today and in the days to come afterward.
2. Be aware that the other person may be struggling. Your conversation partner may have a private, unhealed abortion experience. If so, they are in need of compassion, not a fiery argument. That individual or someone close to them may have had an abortion. They may struggle to deal with the pain, guilt, confusion, and cultural chaos surrounding the issue.
My wife, Tricia, and I aborted our first daughter. We carried this unhealed wound for many years before a conversation cracked the memory open and invited us to seek forgiveness. I know firsthand the need for compassion in these conversations.
3. Find common ground. Find areas of agreement to build rapport. You may want to learn what both of you agree on and start the conversation there. We can often agree that “children deserve protection,” for instance. Your job, then, is to demonstrate that the child in the womb is just as much a child as a child who has been born, and is therefore entitled to the same protections.
4. Listen carefully to understand what your conversation partner is saying and why. Abortion is a divisive issue. Maybe the other person just needs to talk through the subject in order to come to a pro-life conclusion. You can be the person who serves as this sounding board. You can also help to calmly rebut talking points and inaccuracies shaping their opinion.
5. Use stories and personal experiences. Telling stories is the most effective way of generating an emotional connection between people. As Flannery O’Connor said, “A story is a way to say something that can’t be said any other way.”
Of course, you can share a mom’s life decision story from HumanCoalition.org. But your own story may be more powerful in your conversation. How did you come to your pro-life beliefs on a personal level? Have you encountered abortion in some way in your own life? Not every story needs to have a perfect ending to be powerful.
6. Stay calm and respectful. People remember how you made them feel. Maintaining a calm and respectful demeanor, even in heated discussions, can leave a stronger impression than what you actually say.
Showing you are passionate about life without raising your voice or saying hurtful words demonstrates your faith and deep convictions as a Christian. Respect is the foundation of a debate — and it’s something you desire as well.
7. Don’t shift your beliefs. Stand firm on your pro-life convictions and what you know is God’s will for preborn babies in their mother’s womb: LIFE!
Don’t be afraid if you don’t have all the answers. Let the other person know you’ll do some research and get back to them. Trust that the Holy Spirit will lead you. “For the Holy Spirit will teach you at that time what you should say” (Luke 12:12, NIV).
